i got a message from a good of friend of mine who we will call MDR earlier this morning asking me if i have work today. i replied back on her email that i just got in and asked her what’s up (as the email had an “emergency” tone on it). the reply came to as a big surprise and was not really expected:
“will you do me the honor of being the Master of Ceremonies on my wedding reception?”
and that was the time when i realized that my friends are a bunch of imbeciles. the guts of that friend to ask an idiot like i am to host the most important event of her life is unf*ckingbelievable. i have no idea what food she ate the night before she asked me that question, but whatever it is i would suggest for her to stir away from it and avoid it like a plague as it makes her do some crazy, idiotic and life-threatening decisions.
me? an MC? it’s not pnly being an MC but the thing is – AN MC OF A WEDDING RECEPTION! wtf is wrong with this picture you may ask? well here are the many reasons why:
1. i am an idiot when it comes to wedding receptions. as i’ve said dozens of times on previous blogs – I DON’T LIKE WEDDINGS. i can count with only the fingers on my right hand the numbers of weddings i’ve attended. (3 to be exact and that’s within the 25 years of my life). how can i host something which i have no idea about?
2. i HATE (i know hate is a strong word but it’s the most appropriate word to use) formal events. dressing formally, putting your best foot forward, being all prim and proper, listening intently to looooong and boring speeches etc. etc. i have an attention span of a 2 year old, i easily get bored. and when i become the MC, i will have to painstakingly go thru the whole process of it all and MUST even introduce the person who’s going to kill me next out of boredom. talk about suicide, the wedding reception is my killing field.
3. i have no idea what to say. what exactly do they do? i was too busy finishing my food during the last wedding i’ve attended to even notice that there was a person called an “MC” on these kinds of things. i thought the microphone was placed in the middle of the dancefloor and anyone who wants to say something will just grab it and do his/her thing. i never knew that a “wedding host” even existed until now.
4. i have a stage freight. alright, i am used to dancing in front of hundreds of people but i would definitely pee on my pants if i will have to stand up in front of 50 people and say something not silly with the spotlight on me. i can’t do that.
5. i just hate conventional and formal things. i sh*t you not.
but the friend is persistent and suicidal and have already made a run-through of her wedding day with me as the host at the reception. she even gave me a photo of the reception area and asked me to picture myself on the stage. it was the scariest photo i’ve seen in my entire life. tables with fancy settings all facing the stage where am supposed to be, flowers all over the place, disco lights on the floor – i would be surprised if i didn’t have a nightmare about it all tonight.
so i did a little bit of research (yes i did) as to what makes a wedding MC and why my friend is too persistent to have me as hers on her wedding day. and these are the things which i came across with:
Maybe you’re quite funny, confident or have given a good speech before. Whatever the reason, the groom and bride have entrusted you with the responsibility of being a wedding MC, and – typically – your “performance” begins at the reception. Wedding receptions often live or die on the performance of the MC.
– ok so the wedding reception is upto the hands of the MC then… now that’s a good thought… (MDR, wtf are you thinking?)
The Master of Ceremonies (MC) at a wedding serves somewhat like a tour guide or cruise director-only it’s for the wedding activities and events at the dinner, reception, and/or dance.
– on your left side is my right and on your right side is my left… now that’s easy…
He or she will make introductions and announcements, help keep guests and attendees informed of vital information and what is happening at particular times, and help each event transition smoothly into the next.
– alright so MDR just had a mouthful-bite of her rellenong bangus while ZRI (the groom) just burped for downing 2 big gulps of red horse.
Usually a wedding MC will have a microphone so he or she can be easily heard throughout the room and can get the attention of guests when necessary.
– oh right, so they have a microphone. fancy!
If you are asked to act as the MC at a wedding-whether as your primary role because you are a friend of the couple or due to your involvement as the best man, brother of the bride or groom, because you are the disk jockey, or for some other reason, it’s important to take your role seriously. Remember, whether you are introducing the couple, announcing the toasts, or coordinating the special dances and bouquet and garter toss, the focus should always be on the bride and groom and making their day special.
– i think i’d rather be a disc jockey than an MC.
so anyway, after all this ramblings…. without any further ado… the answer is YES, I WILL BE YOUR HOST AT YOUR WEDDING RECEPTION MDR because i love you and i am a good friend. don’t blame me though if your wedding turns out to be a children’s party complete with the palosebo, basagakan palayok and all the parlor games you can think of. and also, be ready with your dance moves. because i want this on the reception..
p.s. i hate you a little for making me make a fool out of myself (am talking about the reception as a past tense) in front of people i actually know.